3 0 DAY S O F FEEDBACK learn. grow. change.
DAILY ENCOURAGEMENT TIPS AND ACTIVITIES
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eedback is a powerful tool for growth, learning, and life change. In this book, we focus on giving and receiving feedback. We have included thirty daily
reflections with encouragement, tips, and simple activities you can do to build a culture of feedback at work, on your team, and in your home. Thirty days can form a habit. Get ready for the adventure!
Let’s get started!
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a bit of perspective Similar to how feeding provides physical nourishment, feedback enables a person to grow in a healthy manner. Feedback is not always negative. It is especially powerful when it is positive and reinforces desired behaviors.
Feedback is a gift #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
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Think About it Feedback helps us discover who God made us to be and how to move forward in what God prepared for us to do. Feedback helps us grow and develop personally, and it helps us focus, change or redirect our efforts for greater movement fruitfulness. Good feedback is powerful for life change.
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get ready Feedback can help you: •
reinforce effective ways of working
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prepare for better performance in the future
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establish more productive behaviors
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be more aware of how your behavior and actions impact others.
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day one Give positive feedback often. Affirming high quality work is one of the best ways to encourage and retain valuable people. T RY T H I S : Catch someone doing something well and let them know. You can call them, send a text, write a note, or praise them in public.
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day two Feedback is a powerful tool for self-awareness. Sometimes we find out that others view us differently than we do ourselves. Start inviting feedback today with this non-threatening and encouraging activity. T RY T H I S : Contact five friends and ask them to send you five adjectives that describe you. What can you learn from their feedback?
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day three Everyone needs positive feedback. WAT C H T H I S : NASA Shuttle Landing (4:39) https://youtu.be/AyTk8LvkBwE Begin watching at the 2:00 mark. Observe how many times the people in the cockpit and mission control use positive feedback. You will be surprised given these are highly trained pilots.
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d a y FOUR “The fastest way to change the feedback culture in your organization is for the leaders to get better at receiving feedback.” Sheila Heen It is great to train leaders to give feedback, but that is not enough. We also need to train feedback receivers. Otherwise we will have passers who are great at throwing the ball, but receivers with little ability to catch it. No matter how skilled the feedback giver is, if the receiver is not interested in hearing the feedback, nothing will get through. T RY T H I S : #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
Ask yourself, “How good am I at receiving feedback?”
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day Five “Wise men and women are always learning, always listening for fresh insights.” Proverbs 18:15 (MSG) T RY T H I S : Take 15 minutes at the end of the day to reflect on what you accomplished today. Celebrate positive progress by writing a journal entry for future encouragement or pray for help to grow in the areas you want to improve.
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day six FEEDBACK TIP: When giving feedback, focus on specific performance, skills, or behaviors - things that can be changed most easily. Do not question motives or intentions. Use coaching instead to deal with necessary long-term character or habit changes.
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day seven “The secret to receiving feedback is to open your mind to hear the feedback, to acknowledge that you can learn from mistakes or even failures, and most importantly, to want to learn.” HBR T RY T H I S : Today, ask someone you trust these three questions: What should I START doing? What should I STOP doing? What should I CONTINUE doing? ...then thank them for their feedback. #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
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day eight “The natural response to evaluation is to feel judged. We have to mature to a place where we respond to it with gratitude and love feedback.” Henry Cloud T RY T H I S : Do something in your office or home to make it VISIBLE that you are open to receiving feedback from others.
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d a y NINE Feedback communicates care. Remember this truth whenever you are hesitant to give feedback. FEEDBACK TIP: •
Feedback shows you notice others and their work.
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Feedback demonstrates you appreciate a job done well or that you desire to contribute to others’ learning and development.
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Feedback indicates you are willing to risk and say something because you want the other person to succeed.
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day ten ”The key to learning is feedback. It is nearly impossible to learn anything without it.” Steven Lewitt FEEDBACK TIP: Get to know SARA - the normal, predictable pattern of emotional responses people feel when they receive constructive feedback. S: shock or surprise A: anger or anxiety R: resistance or rationalization A: acceptance If you know SARA, you can avoid a victim mentality and instead take responsibility to process through to acceptance.
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LOOK FOR THE BEST IN EACH OTHER, AND ALWAYS DO YOUR BEST TO BRING IT OUT. 1 Thes 5:15
day eleven Feedback is future oriented. T RY T H I S : Watch for someone who recently worked hard to learn a new skill and let them know you noticed their effort and progress. -orThink of someone who helped you with a recent task and tell them specifically how they contributed to your learning and success.
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day twelve “I can live for two months on a good compliment.” Mark Twain T RY T H I S : Encourage others to give positive feedback by telling them of a time when you received positive feedback that made a difference in your life.
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day thirteen “The pursuit of excellence requires feedback that describes, affirms, challenges, and improves specific behaviors.” Dan Rockwell T RY T H I S : Practice Feed Forward*. Pick an area you want to improve and ask someone to give you 2-3 ideas, suggestions, or tips that could help. You can also do this as a group or team, moving around the room to ask a different person every few minutes. You could end up with a very helpful list of ideas! #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
*See additional resources (page 37)
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day fourteen FEEDBACK TIP: •
Feedback works best when given regularly, both in formal (360s, performance review, etc) and informal settings.
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In a healthy organization, feedback is given to everyone: direct reports, colleagues, and also the boss or supervisor.
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day fifteen Positive feedback is motivating and energizing. It inspires even those already performing well. Positive feedback allows high performers to celebrate success and work even more effectively on future tasks. T RY T H I S : At a team meeting, before moving on to the next agenda item, stop to commend those who worked on the previous item.
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day sixteen “Even if 90% of the feedback may be wrong, the last 10% may be helpful.” Sheila Heen Learn how to prevent your criticism of the feedback or the feedback giver from being an obstacle to your learning and growth. WAT C H T H I S : How to Use Others’ Feedback to Learn and Grow (20:00) https://youtu.be/FQNbaKkYk_Q?t=12
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day seventeen “I believe in accessibility. I believe in honesty and a culture that supports that. And you can’t have that if you’re not open to receiving feedback”. Mindy Grossman T RY T H I S : Take time to reflect and make a list of what holds you back from hearing feedback - fear, pride, perfectionism, etc. Recognizing those barriers will take away a lot of their power.
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day eighteen T RY T H I S : Look for someone doing something that is not normally
"Let everything you say be good and helpful so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them."
praised like taking notes at a team meeting or cleaning up after an event, etc. Commend that person for their faithfulness, service, and value to the organization’s mission.
EPHESIANS 4:29 NLT
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day nineteen FEEDBACK TIP: Most people value sincere recognition for their achievements above monetary compensation or rewards. Knowing that one’s contributions truly matter has a great impact on satisfaction and performance. Praise, appreciation, and real opportunities for growth and development produce even greater levels of productivity and commitment.
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day twenty “Leaders encourage others to continue the quest and inspire others through courage and hope. Leaders give heart by visibly recognizing others’ contributions to the common vision. With a thank you note, a smile, an award, and public praise, the leader lets others know how much they mean to the organization.” James M Kouzes WAT C H T H I S : How to Give Positive Feedback (1:14) https://youtu.be/yGGMzicL6BM Make your positive feedback specific and explain why their actions were valuable.
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day twenty-one Receiving feedback is a skill. We can all get better with training and practice. T RY T H I S : While receiving feedback: •
use calming strategies (deep breathing, take a break…)
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don’t excuse or justify
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realize you don’t have to act on the feedback
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remember you can validate the feedback with others
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day twenty-two “The key to effective feedback lies in our intentions, not our methods. Your intentions must be about helping others, not just yourself.” Misti Burnmeister FEEDBACK TIP: Before you deliver feedback, be honest with yourself about why you want to give it. Care sincerely about the person and helping improve his/her performance or don’t bring it up.
MISTI BURNMEISTER
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day twenty-three “Ask for feedback from people with diverse backgrounds. Each one will tell you one useful thing.” Steve Jobs T RY T H I S : Invite 5-10 people to help you with a Reflected Best Self Exercise*. Have them respond to you with 1-3 specific examples or stories of when they saw you at your best and how you added value or made a meaningful contribution. Summarize the answers to recognize patterns and learn from the feedback. *See additional resources (page 37) #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
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day twenty-four When you want to give constructive feedback, take time to prepare well for the feedback opportunity. FEEDBACK TIP: •
Pray
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Ask permission to give feedback when appropriate
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Gather facts
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Plan what you want to say
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Be prepared to listen
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Agree on an action plan
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Follow up on the plan
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day twenty-five The best feedback does not happen only in one direction. When you want to give positive feedback you can use questions instead of telling the person the positives that you observed. WAT C H T H I S : Give ownership to the one receiving feedback. (2:18) https://youtu.be/1KTAaOh2FoE Ask the person to identify three things they did well and three things they feel could improve their performance next time. #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
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day twenty-six Good feedback is specific, timely, and relevant to goals. T RY T H I S : Start your next team meeting or group time with each person expressing appreciation to the person on their left for something specific they did recently that contributed to your overall goals.
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day twenty-seven Feedback is most likely to have a positive, lasting effect when its delivery is well timed. FEEDBACK TIP: •
Not too soon. You don’t want to over-react because of emotions of personal impact of the behavior. Cool down first. Have full information regarding the situation. Don’t make assumptions.
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Not too late. Give feedback ASAP while the incident or behavior is still fresh. Do not wait until it happens again it could be far worse than the first time.
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day twenty-eight Maximize your feedback opportunities. Make the other person comfortable. Watch your body language and other non-verbal clues. Consider seating options. Know their communication style preferences. Adjust for culture. Remember for positive feedback, public can be good. Constructive feedback should be done in private. WAT C H T H I S : Effective Environments (2:17) http://glsnext.com/video_detail.asp#/?id=LS2015117 #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
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day twenty-nine “Pay attention to negative feedback and solicit it, particularly from friends. Hardly anyone does that, and it’s incredibly helpful.” Elon Musk If you are in a position of authority, sometimes people won’t give you honest feedback because they are afraid. Recognize this truth, and invite feedback as you can. Also, find a way to get feedback from other sources. T RY T H I S : Ask someone, “What do you need more of from me? What do you want less of from me?” #30DAYSOFFEEDBACK
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day thirty Good feedback is kind, helpful, and specific. When given well, feedback will not alienate the receiver of the feedback, but will motivate them to perform better. T RY T H I S : Make feedback a regular and normal part of your interactions with others. Use constructive feedback when necessary. Share positive feedback often! Learn, grow and change with the gift of feedback!
EPHESIANS 4:15 NLT
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Additional resources Articles 5 Reasons Why Feedback is Important http://www.huffingtonpost.com/karen-naumann/5-reasons-why-feedback-is_b_8728332.html The Art and Science of Giving and Receiving Critism at Work http://www.fastcompany.com/3039412/the-art-science-to-giving-and-receiving-criticism-at-work GIVING POSITIVE FEEDBACK: How to Give Concise Positive Feedback http://www.forbes.com/sites/work-in-progress/2015/10/07/how-to-give-concise-positive-feedback/2/#6bb8bc2619d7 How to Give Positive Feedback at Work http://money.usnews.com/money/blogs/outside-voices-careers/2013/06/06/how-to-give-positive-feedback-at-work How to Give Your Employees the Positive Feedback They Want and Need http://morethanaminute.com/how-to-give-your-employees-the-positive-feedback-they-want-and-need How to Give Positive Feedback to Your Manager and Co-Workers http://blog.impraise.com/360-feedback/how-to-give-positive-feedback-to-your-manager-and-co-workers-performance-review Give Positive Employee Feedback with Your Own Positive Words http://blog.baudville.com/give-positive-employee-feedback-with-your-own-positive-words
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GIVING CONSTRUCTIVE FEEDBACK: Giving Constructive Feedback in the Workplace http://careerminer.infomine.com/giving-constructive-feedback-in-the-workplace/ How to Give Difficult Feedback http://www.forbes.com/pictures/fmlm45ligd/how-to-give-difficult-fe/ How to Give Constructive Feedback http://www.inc.com/yael-bacharach/how-to-give-feedback-developmental-conversations.html How To Give Feedback People Actually Respond To http://www.fastcompany.com/3049058/lessons-learned/how-to-give-feedback-people-actually-respond-to Giving Constructive Feedback http://www.dummies.com/how-to/content/giving-constructive-feedback.html Performance Review Phrases https://blog.udemy.com/performance-review-phrases/ How to Deliver Feedback Effectively http://www.adrianpei.com/blog/how-to-deliver-feedback-effectively/
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INVITING FEEDBACK: Putting Negative Feedback Into Perspective http://www.adrianpei.com/blog/putting-negative-feedback-into-perspective/ How to Receive Feedback Graciously http://www.adrianpei.com/blog/how-to-receive-feedback-graciously/ HBR Reflected Best Self Exercise https://hbr.org/2005/01/how-to-play-to-your-strengths/ar/1 Try Feedforward Instead of Feedback http://www.marshallgoldsmithlibrary.com/cim/articles_display.php?aid=110
BOOKS Giving Feedback: Expert Solutions to Everyday Challenges (Pocket Mentor) - Harvard Business School Press Giving Effective Feedback: 20-Minute Manager Series - Harvard Business Review Thanks for the Feedback:The Science and Art of Receiving Feedback Well - Douglas Stone and Sheila Heen EBook: The Art of Growing Through Feedback - Adrian Pei http://www.adrianpei.com/subscribe-for-free-the-art-of-growing-through-feedback/
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VIDEOS Positive Feedback for Nasa Shuttle Pilots https://youtu.be/AyTk8LvkBwE (6:39 - Start at 2:00) How to Use Others’ Feedback to Learn and Grow - Sheila Heen https://youtu.be/FQNbaKkYk_Q?t=12 (19:28) Learning Motion - Positive Feedback (specific feedback) https://youtu.be/yGGMzicL6BM (1:14) Leadership: How to Give Feedback in a Positive Way - Nick Hill (giving ownership) https://youtu.be/1KTAaOh2FoE (2:18) Bill Hybels Talks About Feedback http://glsnext.com/video_detail.asp#/?id=DM2015011 (33:35)
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30 Days of feedback A Cru VP LDHR Team Project
Project Leader | Terry Morgan Design | Sarah Joelle photography
We are grateful for the collaboration of input and feedback from authors, artists, and feedback advocates around world.
30 Days of Feedback ©2016 Cru. All rights reserved. Cru.org Images used under license from Shutterstock.com
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