insidepoetry
Poetry is the journal of a sea animal living on land, wanting to fly in the air. Carl Sandburg
Insidetime April 2015
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Star Poem of the Month Congratulations Fletcherwinner - HMPwho Leyhill - whose poem wins £15 prizeof Congratulations to to Jamie this months wins our £25 prize forour ‘Star Poem for Runner Up’. the‘Supplement Month’.
Changes
Bob Beck - HMP Grendon I heard it on the radio today And recalled that you played Ellington from memory Your fingers knowing Acting the sophisticated lady With a Manhattan at your side Like your mother Before she took the AA train And sometimes I sat with you Because I could read the guitar chords Though I needed your nod For the changes On the wall above us Wherever we lived There was always that photo You took of our son aged six Sitting at the piano Turned to look back at you A big-eyed satin doll The man he became Now dead Forever looking into the lens And waiting for your nod For the changes Are you playing now Your fingers leaden by grief Sober for him if not for you And with him still dancing Doing the jump
Like the little boy He once was Do nothing ‘til you hear from me You said So I waited and lost But I still need your nod For the changes I know you don’t want me To see your brown eyes cry Not now the bridge is down And that last day you accused me Of faking a sentimental journey And leeching into your life For the lack of blood in mine A hollow man you said Hitching on the caravan Of another’s experience And looking to your nod For the changes What’ll I do when you are far away? You said And I am all alone What if the stars fell down? And the river floods Without you Play some swing again Play them all For him and your shattered heart And I’ll try to remember the chords Though I’ll always need your nod For the changes
Cross Addiction Paul Freeman - HMP Swaleside Banged up for a while now, ain’t sniffed no Charlie for a year and 10 weeks Gotta collect my meds, prescription pills to help me sleep Wake up, I feel rough, can face the day, hot coffee I need it What a pick me up it’s been, sold on canteen it must be legit I’m going gym 5 times a week, if I could I’d go more Is it becoming a problem coz I’m always injured and sore I play cards all the time whole association long Nothing to do with drugs, surely it can’t be wrong I’m feeling a bit down, get loads of chocolate, stuff my face Chocolates not illegal, why should I eat it apace I’ll go mad if I miss out on any of the above Now I know what cross addiction is, it’s present in everything I do I’m addicted to loads of things, is there an addict in you?
I Do Not Know How to Cry Jesse Harris - HMP Portland I do not know how to cry I have seen too much And yearn for darkness I know too much And fear the light I am abandoned to history A blood stained blur On the fabric of life My deeds are all too soon To be forgotten I do not know how to cry I remember too much Seen too much I yearn for darkness Its kiss Its touch Is this asking too much? I am forgotten And do not know how to cry And still the darkness I am denied I wish I could cry
Hanging on the Breeze Trevor Amos - Alpha Hospital A glut of green With bees awakening Pale petals unfold Where memories of winter grow old A season of bursting into fabulous life With swallows and swift There’s a feeling of hope and happy harvest Of days left to the fullest Butterflies ablaze with colour Cuckoos chirping and cooing in the trees The sun is a big yellow duster Polishing the blue, blue sky And white fluffy clouds in a cluster Hanging on the breeze to dry
I Love You Mam Jessica Chappell
You’re kind, you’re sweet You’re lovely, you’re petit From the grass to the stars I love you Mam, I love you I’m not that mad, but You make me happy when I’m sad From the trees to the clouds I love you Mam, I love you You’re always on my mind When I look back on good times From the sand to the sea I love you Mam, I love you I cherish our memories Day after day That’s all I have to say I love you Mam, I love you
Love...
Shayla Chappell Love is sweeter than candy Ours is stronger than chains Vines will weave among us, but we’ll never part Every day I think of you, so I’ll never forget what love means to me
The Inmate Knows His Wife
Arthur Pearce - HMP Maidstone I thought I knew you Simple things Your favourite songs Your love of rings Your shyness, nerves Aggravation The places to touch The lingering sensation You hardly cry But when you do I need to change And think things through The things you like Are the same as mine We found it out In the morning sunshine I know you now, I’ll know you more With every passing day But I never really knew you Until they locked me away
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If you would like to contribute to the Poetry section, please send your poems to ‘Poetry’, Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB.
Supplement Runner Up
Searching Life
Jamie Hughes - HMP Doncaster The drifting vessel, the cold of the night, the warmth of the lantern The occasional splash, the fish rest, moving in no real direction Monotonous, endless, cold Can a wolf be lonely, can a crocodile cry? Constant searches of nothing certain, hope, desire, glory maybe? Eternally optimistic, dreaming, wishing, believing Expectation, adaptation, deserving, justice prevailing A rising sun, a broken dawn, the ship sails quiver, buckle in the wind Another day, just another day Reality, honestly, based on what? A lion adopts a conscience, repents Desolate deserts, dehydration, desperation, calculation, observation Goddam determination Gritted teeth, baking skin, contemplation, deterioration A distant oasis, flowing rum, satisfaction, happy days How high can man climb? The poppy fields of the honest farmer Another day, just another day The flipside, the golden coin Reckless damage, assassination, methodical confusion Obliteration devastation Can a bird fear height? Warm blue skies, the distant humming of the plane’s engine Flash of white, split second realisation, regrettable annihilation Abstaining, ending, noticing, realising can I, should I, could I, will I, have I? Monotonous, endless, cold Another day, just another day Congratulations to this months runner up who wins our £15 prize for ‘Supplement Runner Up’.
My Strongbox S Neal - HMP Lindholme Build for yourself a strongbox Fashion each part with care When it’s as strong as your hand can make it Put all your troubles there Hide there all thought of your failure And each bitter cup that you quaff Lock all your heartaches within it Then sit on the lid and laugh Tell no one else of its contents Never its secrets share When you’ve dropped in your care and worry Keep them forever there Hide them from sight so completely That the world will never dream half Fasten the strongbox securely The sit on the lid and laugh
Oakwood
S J Farr - HMP Oakwood Do your bird, best you can Clean clothes, warm bed Plenty of scran But there is no sign of sentence plan Accommodation takes some beating With its under-floor central heating All the wings new and clean Comes courtesy of the Queen So for now, I do dwell In my single en-suite cell Life ain’t looking all that grim Watch TV, go down to the Gym Fed some chicken, peas and rice Followed by some mamba spice Cup of hooch without the ice Happy days all is nice Your freedom be the only price No rent, no bills, TV License paid Some may say we got it made With rehabilitation failing Thank you anyway, Mr Grayling!
Observations
R Pettener - HMP Stafford 8am the door unlocks Another night over When will it stop? From silence to chaos Time to adjust Not easy nor hard It’s just must 8.15 route time Get in line Anybody else have a blank mind? Or is it just mine? “Boss, Sir, Miss, Gov” Can I quickly grab a shaver “Son, this is prison, no such thing as a favour!” “But boss, I have a visit in a min!” “Sorry son, put an app in!” Simple request, taking 3 days 4 different officers Treating me in different ways “Good morning boss, how do you do?” “What’s it got to do with you?” “Good morning miss, how do you do?” “Good morning to you, hope all is well with you” 8 officers in my presence And 3 in the back 2 upstairs drinking tea Bang up, no staff! No good at spelling Or drafting poetry Sad to be here Jail is not for me
Mum Sam Timms - HMP Leicester I’ve searched a thousand words Of words that could explain How I feel your anger And also feel your pain Because I was raised loved I should have turned out good But off the rails I went And you’d done all you could See I thought I was a man When I was just a kid An no one could ever stop me Or all the crimes I did See I never learned at school But I’ll learn from now So no more prison for me mum I swear to you my vow
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There’s Nothing Wrong with Me Paula Johnson - HMP Low Newton Someone said you need therapy I said they were mistaken They said it would help me to change And stop the mistakes I was making I’ve made mistakes, haven’t we all But I’m really not that bad Everyone loses the plot now and then When somebody makes them mad I can stay calm when I want to As long as you know I am right I can turn and walk away Unless you’re the one starting the fight They tell me to think before I act Or I will end up in trouble I said they don’t know what they’re talking about They’re just trying to burst my bubble But now like they said I’ve made my own bed And I sleep all alone every night And I wish I’d had therapy When I was out there And I may have done more things right
No More Carl Mason HMP Kirklevington Grange No keepsakes No home awaits No rose bush Or garden gate No hand to hold No homemade tea No more sweet dreams No more you and me No trust at all Or love to take No ear to lend No heart to break No best friend No me No you No good end Not a clue No goodbye No hope No faith What was, has gone It’s far too late
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If you would like to contribute to the Poetry section, please send your poems to ‘Poetry’, Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB.
The Hull Hotel
William Shanks - HMP Hull In Hull’s fair city, there’s flashy hotels They give board and lodgings to all the big swells But the greatest of all now, is still in full swing Five beautiful mansions controlled by the king There’s bars on the windows and bells on the door Dirty big guard beds attached to the floor I know ‘cause I’ve been there and sure I can tell There’s no place on Earth like the Hull Hotel I was driven from the Court and driven by bus Drove through the streets with a terrible fuss Drove through the streets like a gangster in state And they never slowed up, till they got to the gate As we entered reception, they asked me my name And asked my address and the reason I came I answered these questions, then a screw rang the bell It was time for my shower in Hull Hotel After my shower, I was dressed like a doll The screw said “Quick, march right into C Hall” As I entered my cell, I looked round in vain To think that, three years here I had to remain For dinner next day, I asked for an egg The screw must have thought I was pulling his leg For when he recovered he let out a yell “Jailbirds don’t lay eggs in Hull Hotel” The day came for me, when I had to depart I was sick as a dog, with joy in my heart For the comfort was good, and the service swell But I’ll never return to The Hull Hotel
insidepoetry Voices from prison Copies are available at a special discount price of £7.50 +£1 p&p for Inside Time readers, family & friends. Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB Tel: 0844 335 6483
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Goodnight
3 Years More...
Anon - HMP Gartree
Adam Thompson - HMP Manchester
I sit here thinking of you My love for you is so deep and true Your beautiful eyes have me hypnotised Every time I look into them I get butterfl ies Your smell, your touch, your warm embrace Always brings a smile to my face The way you make me feel and hold me close When I am sad and down It seems like the perfect place I love the way you make me laugh For absolutely no reason at all I love the way you kiss me The way you hold me tight And most of all I love the way You say goodnight
You body feels empty, then it fills up with shock ‘GUILTY’ they say, and you’re led from the dock You’re soon in the sweat box going through the prison gates Emotions constantly changing, now angry and full of hate Not just your dignity is stripped, “Now remove your socks” “you best comply, or you’re going down the block”
‘Nick’ Names
Denzil Davies - HMP Ranby First they said “You look like Shadrach” Old white whiskered ‘baggy eyes’ on Emerdale Farm But like water just run off a duck’s back Well, it never done me no ‘arm Next they were calling me ‘Lion’ That’s better, mane of hair perhaps? Because? Because? Oh no – it’s old films they rely on I’m ‘put ‘em up’ from Wizard of Oz!!! Then they found a real showstopper “Play friends, who now? I bid” “WAX ON, WAX OFF – you grasshoppers I’m Miyagi from Karate Kid” Back to the future, it’s been years Since my heart heard the name I once had One that’s been bleached by a blizzard of tears The one when they just called me ‘Dad’
Recollection
Francesco Perticarari - HMP Lewes I always remember your smiling eyes The surrounding chatter in the visits hall Our embraced hearts pounding
Now wearing prison greys at the wing you arrive They have took away your clothes and you’re feeling deprived The prison has finished taking, they start to give Only the basics to survive, but not enough to live Everyday tasks are a struggle and strive You’re beginning to wonder if you will make it out alive It’s been three days before you can use the phone You’re hitting the numbers as you hear the dial tone Your wife is in tears, it’s the first time you’ve been apart “I love you” she says, she speaks from the heart “We will get through this together, you’re not alone” “Keep your head strong, you will soon be home” You’re missing your children, it’s driving you insane Feeling the guilt, you know your mother is suffering the same Your so called friends are no longer near Fear sets in that they have forgotten your here You reach through the window to feel the rain It’s falling hard but not washing away the pain After a week you see the truth about jail The establishment was set up to help you fail Months pass by once you grasp the routine More drugs and violence than you have ever seen You’re now in your prime, as tough as a nail You will leave this place with many a tale One day you wake and you have had enough You have learnt your lesson, you pack your stuff It’s gone so quick, your sentence is up No more drinking brews from a plastic cup No more eating food that at best is tough No more using razors that leave your face so rough At last you’re free! You feel so good Appreciating the little things the way you should You’re working hard but also enjoying your life You’re with your children; you’re with your wife Feeling complete more than you thought you could Then all of a sudden, rattle, clunk, thud... It’s morning; they have just opened the cell door Your heart is broken, again it is tore It was all a dream; it was in your head You hadn’t escaped, you were asleep in bed Window bars, four walls and a cold concrete floor You’ve done 4 months, you have 3 years more
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If you would like to contribute to the Poetry section, please send your poems to ‘Poetry’, Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB.
Supplement Runner Up
Today’s World Theo Roberts - HMP Wandsworth When I wanna ease the pain, I get high like a plane My people feel the same and need something for the brain If I got Basmati, I ain’t talking about grain I’m talking about the stuff that makes you forget your name Time flies when I mess with the clockwork I get a little paranoid whenever that lock turns Slipping on a visit, then you’re hitting the block first Might see in double vision, like visions I rocked first People going under as you wonder why it’s legal God blessed a plant for every one of his people It’s not for everyone, but to some it’s medicinal Power to the ones that made the flower impersonal The world’s turned digital and virtually unphysical Ebola wanna kill us while we twerking to mystical People wanna scare ya trying to blame their religion And terrorise the truth when they know that it isn’t Congratulations to this months runner up who wins our £15 prize for ‘Supplement Runner Up’.
Hello Is There Anyone Out There? Kenny Casalė - HMP Stafford
I know I’m doing time at Her Majesty’s request in the supposedly ‘C cat’ Stafford Prison But is it really that hard for you to just sit down, shut up and listen Try to answer my questions they are only an enquiry Don’t just sit and smile then say “Ooh I’ll put that in the diary” The application form has a ‘for whom menu’ to enable it to get where it’s meant But some staff intervene it goes astray or they tell you “It just wasn’t sent” Why all the bang up? Why all the locks? Erm if you have a question fill out an app and put it in the box We’re expected to stick to the rules and do as they say While some of the officers flout these, ignore the PSI law yet still claim their pay You must work here, have a job, it will get you outta your cell each day You can choose where you want to work “yeah” till security have their say The long boring mind numbing hours are expected so they can fill a page Then turn around and offer you a pitiful amount and have the cheek to call it a wage My meds are on a much needed repeat prescription But somehow they lose the app and all the important description You will have to manage until you re-apply But in the meantime I’ll see if I can try This is a ruse to shut me up and fob me off Like it’s only a tickle or maybe a cough This is true just like I told her Is this what they said to the nurse with Ebola I hope that this poem makes sense and in turn duly rhymes ‘Cause I’m going now to post this to our hero.... Inside Time
Double Cell
Like a couple of benders
Shane Lynch - HMP Isle of Wight
Sleeping patterns differ Try to compromise End in an argument What a surprise
What a crazy life it is in prison Forced to share a double cell Two grown men in a small, tight, space Trying to get along in such a horrid place The officers chuck you in Whether you like it or not Haven’t got a say Feel like I’m back in a cot A bunk bed to share One TV and en suite Forced to be civilized From the moment we meet Who has top bunk And control of the remote Just a couple of obstacles to overcome As you try to stay afloat The worst part is so vile It has to be the bog Inches away from another man While he’s dropping a log Can’t imagine this for much longer Anyone’s bound to crack Who invented double cells? Well, like ‘David Cameron’ GIVE EM THE SACK! Argue and moan all day long That’s all that we do Constantly stuck together Worse than superglue He likes his footy I’m into Eastenders Cooped up all night together
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Morning comes around He watches TV and makes a mess I put on the radio And nag to play chess Door gets unlocked Get the broom and the mop Pull together for a clean up Finish just in time for the slop Collect up the slop And always think ‘what a joke’ Gulp it down quickly Then head for a soak Shower time now It’s the only time alone But oh look here’s your cell mate Jumping in the comfort zone That’s the last straw Got to get out of this double Express concerns to the officers Who laugh and reply “you’re having a bubble” Another night in With a strange man again I know I’m not alone And you all feel my pain Get rid of the double cell And convert all to single This is absolute madness, INHUMANE! Sort it out quickly Before we’re ALL driven INSANE!
At Least
Dan Skipworth - HMP Hatfield As I’m led out in handcuffs away from the dock How I wish I could just turn back the clock I didn’t listen to reason I didn’t see sense Now I’m going to prison for my first offence I think to myself ‘things could be worse’ The way I was going it was here or a hearse There’ll be plenty of time to overcome regret For the things that I sacrificed for pills, booze and ket At least it was 3 years and it wasn’t four The value could’ve been higher, the weight could’ve been more I’m only in my 20s and I’ll still be young When my life can restart and my time will be done I have to look to the future, not back at my past When consequences were ignored and life moved too fast I’ll just think of the positives and wait for my turn To walk out of that gate, never, ever to return
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If you would like to contribute to the Poetry section, please send your poems to ‘Poetry’, Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB.
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Calm Yourself
Johnathan Gilbert - HMP Parc
© Chris Smyth - Fotolia.com
It Ain’t Right James Kaler - HMP Swinfen Hall I’m a nice guy in the daylight But a mean guy when it’s late night Me and my friend’s can’t stay tight And I know that it ain’t right I do know the difference between wrong and right How easy it is to take a life Kids feel the need to use a knife And I know that it ain’t right Bare man on road just wanna fight Racial attacks are a common sight It shouldn’t matter if you are black or white And I know that it ain’t right When the phone rings it gives your mom a fright Coz she ain’t stupid man she knows what it’s like Your whole family know that drugs and murders rife Between life and death it’s a fine line Coz everywhere you go there’s a lot of crime But we still get involved it’s like we’re blind And we know that it ain’t right When you live like this you’re on borrowed time One wrong choice and you could die Your friends seek revenge and your family cry And you know that it ain’t right People sniff and smoke just to feel high For a little while they feel like they can fly But in the long term they all lose their mind And they know that it ain’t right Rumours travel up and down the grapevine And everybody drinks from the poison wine People let it start beef, I don’t know why And we know that it ain’t right So if you wanna make sure that you stay alive Wanna make sure that you have a happy life Wanna settle down, have kids with a pretty wife Then you need to get yourself away from crime You need to grow up, be sensible and get wise Coz we all know that... IT AIN’T RIGHT
Calm yourself please Stop racing and escalating Thought processes a plenty So little calm and quiet Thoughts that pop up and say ‘Hiya’ Grey and long dark days Melancholy is free to invade Think of something to steal a pause A mountain, a river and tree filled gorge Christmas when I was a small boy The present under the tree, the sought after toy Memories of so happy times To fight back the vulgar crimes Calm yourself please Calm yourself, no more now Paranoid stupidity, things so hard to believe Of all my given parts you are the devil in me I endeavour to absorb spiritual respite To conquer the mindless angst and spite Positive words of heroic deeds Poems and passages that swell the insatiable need Not of darkness and dread that crushes the soul But clear thoughts of meadows, nature and honest toil Beautiful beaches and long days of summer Warmth and comfort given by burning embers Places unrivalled for the weariest traveller Sustenance, wine, family, friends together Calm yourself, I am tired now Calm yourself, stop your rage I seek a kiss, an embrace to ease the pain Of mind and cognitive cruel games I hear children’s voices, laughter and play Images of a gate, a path and a way To a home of beauty and much love Away from the bitterness, corruption and dread A family of treasure troves and so much more Night-times of tranquillity and the gentle snore This is where I should concentrate my mind Defeating the villain of mindful crime Think positive and uplifting thoughts Rise above the cajoling, negativity and dwarf! Be calm now and let me rest
My Beautiful Children
Ashley O’Neill - HMP Wymott My children’s love is something That no one can explain It’s made of deep devotion Of sacrifice and pain It’s endless and undying And enduring come what may For no one can destroy it Or take that love away My children’s love are all these things It’s the greatest treasure known But the greatest children in the world Are the ones I call my own
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Love
Blall Haroon - HMP Lowdham Grange Love is a river Love is an ocean Love is earth and love is the sky The beating of the heart is love To get sleepless nights is also love Had love not been there then there would be nothing Neither would I be there nor would you be You are never away from me Neither am I away from you You stay within me as a lotus stays inside water When I see, I see you all over When I think, I think about you You flow inside me, as a river flows into sea Love is a fragrance and love is like a glow Love is an idol and love is nature To be out of one’s senses is love To give up one’s life ‘is love’ Love is like a veil Love is like a mirror Love is between a man and a woman Love is devotion and love is beholding Eyes full of tears is a form of love To feel restless is also love
Salute Charlie Hebdo Keith Baker - HMP Norwich I’ve never read their magazine Their cartoons I have never seen But as I stared at my TV Something stirred inside of me Ten journalists who will write no more Their bodies strewn across the floor Their only ‘crime’ to use a pen I raised my glass to SALUTE them So come and join me one and all For those brave souls who took the fall SALUTE with me you chattering classes Whose wine is sipped from crystal glasses SALUTE if you are down the pub As you prepare to eat your grub And those at home with cups of tea Raise them high SALUTE with me For to maintain democracy Freedom of speech must be the key So Inside Time if you agree And in a show of solidarity Perhaps your next front page could read Three simple words JE SUIS CHARLIE
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If you would like to contribute to the Poetry section, please send your poems to ‘Poetry’, Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB.
My Crime David Richardson - HMP Humber This is about my crime, this happened in October 2008 I hit a tree at 82mph and I killed my best mate He had a daughter and he also had a wife He was an innocent man, and I took away his life I wake up every morning, and I’m serving IPP If anyone should have died, it should have been me I now wouldn’t be serving, this indefinite time It was an unintentional car crash that’s a bit harsh for my crime I almost died, I was in intensive care I was in a coma for a month, to survive that, it’s very rare But it’s not really about me, it’s all about my mate I didn’t mean to do this, I’ve been left in a state I’m very sorry to his family, and his wife and daughter She’s just a little girl, she’s 7 and a quarter Now she’ll grow up and she’ll be without a dad It’s all my fault, I feel very bad If there’s anything I can do, will you please let me know I’m sorry for what I done to my friend, sorrow is all I show People told his parents I was laughing at that I’d done You better leave your town, you better had run There were the threats I had, but I stayed and held my ground I didn’t mean to do it, maybe I shouldn’t have stuck around All the stories they made up, it made matters worse I was threatened with my life, that I’ll end up in a hearse! I understand what I’ve done to him, I also feel the same I’m very sorry to his family, they’ve barred me from my home town I think that might be best, as I’ll never live it down Once again I say sorry that sorry comes from me It should have been me who died, when we hit the tree I understand you all hate me, I understand you’re all mad I am so, so, sorry I never meant to come across as bad
You Cannot Disguise the Prison Lies Russell Wellings - HMP Highdown
If you’re real in life then you cannot disguise The pride some people lack in jail with their cheesy lies The types of prisoners you meet seriously have no shame If lying was a sport they’d be top of their game Let’s start with the most common one “Hi mate do you have a spare burn?” See how nice they’re requesting voice is compared to their reptilian gurn They’re quick to be giving out the charm holding out their hand That old chestnut that the pigs took their two grand Then there are the wafflers you’re guaranteed to meet The ones with Range Rovers outside but prison pumps on their feet You laugh away to yourself but you cannot discard That they look like a scarecrow on their ID card We’ve all heard the plastic gangsters going on about their high life When really they held up the Co-op with a kitchen knife I’m a bad man on road got my ends on lock Truthful translation they f*cked up on the rock Outside I earn a grand a week is a common groan Which basically means that they love a crisis loan I think to myself the bullshit that everyone can see You’re probably doing twelve months for flogging your mum’s TV And what about the daydreamers whose lips get looser and looser A dose of too much MTV as they’re a record producer Admit you need to go on Jezza and do a lie detector test I’ll be the first to admit as I must anticipate That time to time my stories do exaggerate So if you fall into this category then hold up your hand Your bullshit don’t wash as I was a Pablo Escobar’s second in command!
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Inside Jemma Hawkins HMP Foston Hall Wake up, headsore Look round, same floor Bad dreams, same old Room hot, heart cold Meds call, clothes on Drugs down, all gone Lock up, take roll Found hate, lost soul Unlock, get mail Chit chat, tall tale Fetch stores, shout then Own rooms, in again Let out, get clean Hand in canteen Back in, drink tea Read book, watch TV Back out, get fed Full stomach, empty head Walk round, look outside Brain dead, tongue tied Wash plate, empty bin Once more locked in Hours drag, bad mood Out again, more food Use phone, if free Watch more TV Drink coffee, rinse cup Time passes, locked up Talk about random stuff Days hard, nights tough Bed time, don’t pray Same drill, everyday
insidepoetry Voices from prison Copies are available at a special discount price of £7.50 +£1p&p for Inside Time readers, family and friends. Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB Tel: 0844 335 6483
Holy Smoke Scott Daley - HMP Wymott When your last rizzla has gone The fear’s begun I look through my pad The feeling is mad I get on the bell The fear and the hell The clocky so cocky All he does is mock me Defeat in my head Do I get in my bed? No not I, with a spark in my eye! I look to the sky and to my surprise The fear subsides The answer is right in my pad No longer feeling mad Now I’m no disciple But I’ve got a bible Just one page I took From the holy book Now how’s that for luck? After all it’s only a book! I carefully roll the page And to my dismay, no guilt did I feel I wasn’t ready to kneel! As I began to strike at the wheel, The paper it lit! I inhaled just a bit It was definitely lit Loving every bit! My lungs were full Feeling ill The thrill gone! Then I began to choke On the bible rolled smoke Running out of rizzlas ain’t no joke When you’re choking on the holy bloke!
Travelling Stephen Marsh - HMP Swaleside Drifting through the wounds of time Yearning for hope so sublime The scent of a kiss in the air Promise of moments for you to dare Meeting people you never knew Living a life of someone other than you The destination is the aim Travelling the path is just the game
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If you would like to contribute to the Poetry section, please send your poems to ‘Poetry’, Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB.
Sweet Dreams
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Basic Until I Die
Andrew Luby - HMP Hull
Yo Yo - HMP Isle of Wight
Drug dealers, burglars, rapists and violent men Look the same, I’ve seen them Police, psychology, judges and probation Look the same, I’ve seen them
It’s coming up to our first year Parkhurst’s basics haven’t had much cheer Locked away without TV No ‘soash, no money, they’ve taken the ‘P’
Trucks full of chopped-up men, women and children Look the same, I’ve seen them Bosnian babies and skinned rabbits nailed to doors Look the same, I’ve seen them The way of killing men and bears Look the same, I’ve seen it The act of virtue and crime Look the same, I’ve seen it Burnt bodies, excrement and carrion festering Look the same, I’ve seen them Black blood, black pus, black bile, black tongues Look the same, I’ve seen them Self harmers, cutters, razor blade swallowers Look the same, I’ve seen them Red wine, and crimson wet beds of blood Look the same, I’ve seen them Crying men, guilt laden men, prison hard men Look the same, I’ve seen them Shell shocked men, frightened men, killing men Look the same, I’ve seen them Institutionalised men, suicidal men, battle scarred men Look the same, I’ve seen them Their sweet dreams and prison life Look the same, I see them!
© kav777 - Fotolia.com
One Beautiful Lifetime
Edward Owens - HMP Exeter From out of the earth it pushes its head All year was spent preparing its bed A small green shoot, not much to see But it fills the garden with tremendous glee It’s pampered and fed the very best This will be better than the rest In the spring it will start to bloom Adding picturesque grace to any room It’s in its prime and oh what a sight As it opens its petals in the early morning light The stem is strong, straight and stout Gloriously festooned with leaves branching out The summer is over and now is past He knew the flower would not last But he is a man, no tear will he shed No now, not now this beautiful flower is dead
To My Dearest Darling Lisa Malcolm Smith - HMP Kennet To my dearest darling Lisa I hope that you are well I’m sick of being stuck in here It’s like a living hell
© laszlolorik - Fotila
I Am Still With You Sister R S Bailey - HMP Garth I I I I I
give this one thought, to keep with you am still with you do not weep am a thousand winds that blow am a diamond that glints on snow am the sunlight on ripened grain
I am the gentle autumn’s rain When you awaken in the morning hush I am the swift uplifting rush Of quiet birds in circled fl ight So do not think of me in jail I am still with you in each new dawn
It’s mad what we take for granted Being able to come and go Then that judge bloody locked me up The cheeky so and so Oh well it’s no good moaning If I wasn’t doing the time I wouldn’t be writing letters to you And trying to make them rhyme There’s a funny range of blokes in here Murderers, thieves and crooks There’s even a bloke that worked in a bank That made millions fiddling the books At least I’ll be coming home quite soon And this will come to an end The main thing that has helped me through Is having you my dearest friend Your letters brighten up my day They have done from the start Thank you Lisa very much From the bottom of my heart
Locked up early, no reviews No weekday phone call, no homeland news No gym, no clothes, just prison kit I feel like a tramp, I look like sh*t I once took pride in my appearance My civvies now gone to ‘Reception disappearance’ Doctors trips have more or less doubled More and more ‘basics’ deeply troubled Every ‘basic’ takes a pill It stops us rebelling, but makes you ill Meanwhile, more and more thieving, lots more fights But amongst ‘enhanced’ and ‘standard’ shites But though they steal and though they fight They don’t get reduced, so it must be alright After all, guilty men are friends with the staff You see them in the office having a ‘laff’ There’s been no visit, no prison inspection Advisers, reformists ignored us in objection No challenge, no appeal, no Legal Aid Grayling removed it so no one gets paid So, no matter how much I puff and pant I’m no longer a prisoner, I’m an ‘innocent’ And Human Rights are just pie in the sky So it seems I’m on ‘basic until I die’
Alcoholic’s Ode
Craig Burger - HMP Lewes I drink and think through a liquid hue Amber, dark, clear and sometimes blue I try to remember what I drink to forget What’s happened to me, what fates I have met! I am looked after, thanks to the state Benefits roll in, barmen shout ‘that’s great’ My face is too puffy, full of lines and veins Years of lying under liquor rains! I have no family, none that want to know Through glass bottoms I watched them go I forced them away whilst downing another Hell, I even offended my very own mother! Where to next? A pub or A&E I suppose At least there I will get another dose Then to the graveyard, in my very own crate What a life, what a man, so f*cking great!
Insidetim
e April 2
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If you would like to contribute to the Poetry section, please send your poems to ‘Poetry’, Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB.
Supplement Runner Up
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Logan’s dad was a handy lad But had a heart of gold and was far from bad A gentle giant with gentle nature He earned his crust on the sires as a builder Logan was his first born, the pride of his life Second to none not even his wife He supported his family but struggled at times His mental health was always fine but that was until his dear son died Depression doesn’t cover such mental torture The murder of Logan put his mind to the slaughter Sectioned to prevent suicide was the result of his pain The bullet hits Logan’s father in the brain
One Bullet Danny Birkett - HMP Wymott When Logan was shot with a gun over a quarrel The gunman didn’t think he’d cause so much sorrow The destination of the bullet was only meant for Logan But it exited his body and gave whole family a problem The 9mm bullet that ended his life Went through his chest and hit his mum, dad, brother and wife Logan’s kid brother was a young lad called Patrick He used to get teased, his two legs were like matchsticks So how could he ever be a talent at football? Logan was the lad who showed him it all One sunny morning when Patrick was 6 Logan taught him to shoot with dad between the sticks “Aim for the inside of the post and whack the bull hefty” Logan was happy his bro was a lefty “Paddy sack the keep ups, they don't mean shit on the pitch” “And stop balancing the ball on your head, that won’t get ya rich” “The key is speed and learning your step overs” “With your left foot you’ll be the star of the Rovers” “It’s not about fancy boots or a poncy side part” “it’s about determination attitude and heart” Patrick remembered these words every time he played He could have gone far Perhaps a future star But then his big brother was taken away The gunman thought his shot was like a perfect putt But his hole in 1 was a hole in 2 When paddy was shot in the foot
Logan’s wife was a beautiful lady At 5 foot 4 he called her his baby An artist by trade, her favourite colour was blue She was inspired by the sky but Logan was her muse Painting afforded her a break from the world She drew sketches of her man, how she loved being his girl For countless hours they would lay entwined in bed Logan used to inspire, but with the way he died she now can’t use red And yellow makes her think of the beach where they married With the sun shining down How colours can be so mean Logan’s wife can’t bear to carry on the career she planned A gunman’s bullet in the artist’s hand Logan’s mum was as devout as they come You could find her in church rain, sleet or sun But since the death of her son, her faith was undone No more Ave Maria no more kingdom come Logan’s mum was known for her heart A true philanthropist right from the start Whilst physically frail and somewhat pale Nobody believed her health would fail But when her boy was murdered her spirit was lost And wouldn’t you know her heart paid the cost Logan and God were the reason it beat But with them both gone it was only defeat There is such a thing as death from a broken heart Logan’s mother was hit in the heart 1 bullet and 5 gone so soon The death of dear Logan sent his family to their tombs Then there’s the gunman Sentenced to 25 years to life or is it 25 to death? 2 years into his sentence the bullet took his last breath Congratulations to this months runner up who wins our £15 prize for ‘Supplement Runner Up’.
Next month we revert to the usual poetry section, we will award a prize of £25 to the entry selected as our ‘Star Poem of the Month’. To qualify for a prize, poems should not have won a prize in any other competition or been published previously. Send entries to: Inside Time, Poetry, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire, SO30 2GB. Please put your name, number and prison on the same sheet of paper as your poem. If you win we can’t send your money if we don’t know who or where you are! By submitting your poems to Inside Time you are agreeing that they can be published in any of our ‘not for profit links’, these include the newspaper, website and any forthcoming books. You are also giving permission for Inside Time to use their discretion in allowing other organisations to reproduce this work if considered appropriate, unless you have clearly stated that you do not want this to happen. Any work reproduced in other publications will be on a ‘not for profit’ basis. WHEN SUBMITTING YOUR WORK PLEASE INCLUDE THE FOLLOWING PERMISSION: THIS IS MY OWN WORK AND I AGREE TO INSIDE TIME PUBLISHING IT IN ALL ASSOCIATE SITES AND OTHER PUBLICATIONS AS APPROPRIATE.
insidepoetry Voices from prison Copies are available at a special discount price of £7.50 +£1 p&p for Inside Time readers, family & friends. Inside Time, Botley Mills, Botley, Southampton, Hampshire SO30 2GB Telephone: 0844 335 6483
