THE WILD OATS PROJECT: ONE WOMAN'S MIDLIFE QUEST FOR PASSION AT ANY COST BY ROBIN RINALDI

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The Wild Oats Project: One Woman's Midlife Quest For Passion At Any Cost By Robin Rinaldi. Modification your habit to put up or squander the time to just talk with your friends. It is done by your everyday, don't you really feel burnt out? Now, we will reveal you the new behavior that, in fact it's an older habit to do that could make your life a lot more certified. When really feeling burnt out of consistently chatting with your pals all downtime, you can discover guide qualify The Wild Oats Project: One Woman's Midlife Quest For Passion At Any Cost By Robin Rinaldi then read it.

Review “Rinaldi yields insights through her willingness to reveal the messy way she muddles through the year... Unlike other recent memoirs in which a woman, finding her life wanting, learns what frightens her and emerges with a stronger sense of self, this one, to its credit, doesn't go for the Hallmark-card ending.” ?Elle “Brutally honest and real . . . Refreshing” ?The Daily Beast “A sexual-awakening romp wrapped in a female-empowerment narrative” ?The Washington Post “If you want to read something about somebody who might be a lot like you, somebody who's brave enough to admit that she doesn't always (or even usually) know what she's doing but she does it anyway, somebody who won't preach at you or make you feel like you have it even less together than you do--then you can't NOT read this book.” ?Sara Nelson, Omnivoracious “A stunning report . . . Readers will be provoked and fascinated by Rinaldi's forthright memoir of daredevil sexual exploration and self-liberation.” ?Booklist “Rinaldi does not hide the dark side to this odyssey . . . her ability to grasp its soul-driving necessity without insisting on winning over her readers renders this a notable work of self-knowledge.” ?Publishers Weekly “A sensitive, intimate and bold story.” ?Kirkus “Robin Rinaldi's horizontal adventures will make you howl with laughter and cry with recognition-whatever the state of your romantic or sex life. And you'll stay up all night reading to learn how it all turns out. Her bravery and introspection are inspiring to anyone who has taken a moment to wonder: Is there more to life than this?” ?Amy Sohn, author of The Actress and Prospect Park West

“Her daring project and avid search for passion is a true page-turner. For anyone who's wondered 'what if' or 'should I?'” ?Library Journal “The Wild Oats Project uniquely chronicles an intelligent woman's exhilarating pilgrimage into the rest of her life, living as she damn well pleases. And why not? Men have been doing so since the beginning of time. Rinaldi's memoir is groundbreaking, sexy, and a joy to read.” ?Suzanne Finnamore, author of Split: A Memoir of Divorce “Robin Rinaldi's The Wild Oats Project is a daring and enlightening exploration of sexual identity, marriage, and the search for an authentic self. Rinaldi takes the reader on an enthralling journey, one that will not soon be forgotten. The Wild Oats Project is a rich and essential read.” ?Laura van den Berg, author of The Isle of Youth “I loved this brave and inspiring book. Rinaldi rejects middle-aged quiescence in favor of living boldly, sensually, and to the hilt. Would that we all were so brave.” ?Julia Scheeres, New York Times bestselling author of Jesus Land “Extraordinarily frank . . . Her book is important because of the way it unashamedly puts the quest for female sexual fulfillment centre stage . . . It is a testament to how far feminism has taken us all that a woman can not only undertake such an adventure but write about it so brazenly. And in a porn-saturated world where, too often, the lens through which we see sex is masculine, her unapologetic account of her search for sexual nirvana is hugely refreshing.” ?Sunday Times “[Rinaldi] seduces us with her candor and vulnerability” ?Chicago Tribune

About the Author Robin Rinaldi is a journalist and the author of The Wild Oats Project: One Woman's Midlife Quest for Passion at Any Cost. Her bylines appear in The New York Times, Oprah Magazine, Yoga Journal, and elsewhere, and she has been featured on Dr. Oz, The Meredith Vieira Show, Dr. Drew, and BBC Radio.

THE WILD OATS PROJECT: ONE WOMAN'S MIDLIFE QUEST FOR PASSION AT ANY COST BY ROBIN RINALDI PDF

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THE WILD OATS PROJECT: ONE WOMAN'S MIDLIFE QUEST FOR PASSION AT ANY COST BY ROBIN RINALDI PDF

What if for just one year you let desire call the shots? The project was simple: Robin Rinaldi, a successful magazine journalist, would move into a San Francisco apartment, join a dating site, and get laid. Never mind that she already owned a beautiful flat a few blocks away, that she was forty-four, or that she was married to a man she'd been in love with for eighteen years. What followed-a year of abandon, heartbreak, and unexpected revelationis the topic of this riveting memoir, The Wild Oats Project. Monogamous and sexually cautious her entire adult life, Rinaldi never planned on an open marriage-her priority as she approached midlife was to start a family. But when her husband insisted on a vasectomy, something snapped. If I'm not going to have children, she told herself, then I'm going to have lovers. During the week, she would live alone, seduce men (and women), attend erotic workshops, and have wall-banging sex. On the weekends, she would go home and be a wife. Her marriage provided safety and love, but she also needed passion, and she was willing to go outside her marriage to find it. At a time when the bestseller lists are topped by books about eroticism and the shifting roles of women, this brave, brutally honest memoir explores how our sexuality defines us, how it relates to maternal longing, and how we must walk the line between loving others and staying true to ourselves. Like the most searing memoirs, The Wild Oats Project challenges our sensibilities, yielding truths that we all can recognize but that few would dare write down.

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Sales Rank: #105891 in Books Published on: 2015-03-17 Released on: 2015-03-17 Original language: English Number of items: 1 Dimensions: 8.60" h x 1.08" w x 5.88" l, .0 pounds Binding: Hardcover 304 pages

Review “Rinaldi yields insights through her willingness to reveal the messy way she muddles through the year... Unlike other recent memoirs in which a woman, finding her life wanting, learns what frightens her and emerges with a stronger sense of self, this one, to its credit, doesn't go for the Hallmark-card ending.” ?Elle “Brutally honest and real . . . Refreshing” ?The Daily Beast

“A sexual-awakening romp wrapped in a female-empowerment narrative” ?The Washington Post “If you want to read something about somebody who might be a lot like you, somebody who's brave enough to admit that she doesn't always (or even usually) know what she's doing but she does it anyway, somebody who won't preach at you or make you feel like you have it even less together than you do--then you can't NOT read this book.” ?Sara Nelson, Omnivoracious “A stunning report . . . Readers will be provoked and fascinated by Rinaldi's forthright memoir of daredevil sexual exploration and self-liberation.” ?Booklist “Rinaldi does not hide the dark side to this odyssey . . . her ability to grasp its soul-driving necessity without insisting on winning over her readers renders this a notable work of self-knowledge.” ?Publishers Weekly “A sensitive, intimate and bold story.” ?Kirkus “Robin Rinaldi's horizontal adventures will make you howl with laughter and cry with recognition-whatever the state of your romantic or sex life. And you'll stay up all night reading to learn how it all turns out. Her bravery and introspection are inspiring to anyone who has taken a moment to wonder: Is there more to life than this?” ?Amy Sohn, author of The Actress and Prospect Park West “Her daring project and avid search for passion is a true page-turner. For anyone who's wondered 'what if' or 'should I?'” ?Library Journal “The Wild Oats Project uniquely chronicles an intelligent woman's exhilarating pilgrimage into the rest of her life, living as she damn well pleases. And why not? Men have been doing so since the beginning of time. Rinaldi's memoir is groundbreaking, sexy, and a joy to read.” ?Suzanne Finnamore, author of Split: A Memoir of Divorce “Robin Rinaldi's The Wild Oats Project is a daring and enlightening exploration of sexual identity, marriage, and the search for an authentic self. Rinaldi takes the reader on an enthralling journey, one that will not soon be forgotten. The Wild Oats Project is a rich and essential read.” ?Laura van den Berg, author of The Isle of Youth “I loved this brave and inspiring book. Rinaldi rejects middle-aged quiescence in favor of living boldly, sensually, and to the hilt. Would that we all were so brave.” ?Julia Scheeres, New York Times bestselling author of Jesus Land “Extraordinarily frank . . . Her book is important because of the way it unashamedly puts the quest for female sexual fulfillment centre stage . . . It is a testament to how far feminism has taken us all that a woman can not only undertake such an adventure but write about it so brazenly. And in a porn-saturated world where, too often, the lens through which we see sex is masculine, her unapologetic account of her search for sexual nirvana is hugely refreshing.” ?Sunday Times “[Rinaldi] seduces us with her candor and vulnerability” ?Chicago Tribune

About the Author Robin Rinaldi is a journalist and the author of The Wild Oats Project: One Woman's Midlife Quest for Passion at Any Cost. Her bylines appear in The New York Times, Oprah Magazine, Yoga

Journal, and elsewhere, and she has been featured on Dr. Oz, The Meredith Vieira Show, Dr. Drew, and BBC Radio. Most helpful customer reviews 137 of 152 people found the following review helpful. Sad saga of the dissolution of a marriage By Peter J. Lyden, III Should have been subtitled "One Woman's Midlife Quest for Revenge and Its Foreseeable Fallout." It's hard to dislike Rinaldi. In fact, I empathized with her hurt, and anger, and disappointment after her husband Scott announces during a couples therapy session that he's having a vasectomy in the wake of a false-positive pregnancy test - a textbook example of a passive-aggressive strike. Despite his protestations as the story progresses that all he wants is for them to get back together and make the marriage work, his absolute refusal to consider the one thing she says will complete their relationship speaks louder than his words. He doesn’t say much; she wears her heart on her sleeve. Their life prior to her adventure is, by her description, loving and respectful, fraught with the usual disagreements and compromises endemic to long-term relationships, but overall caring and stable. Her seemingly impulsive reaction to his announcement – if I can’t have a baby, then I’ll have lovers – appears way out of proportion, not to mention a non-sequitur. It implies deeper divisions not explicit in her narrative, though they are hinted at in her recollection of a moment when she thought Scott was about to explain his steadfast refusal to consider having a family. Just as she thinks he is going to open up to her, he trails off, and she is left with no answers and no baby. A reasonable response would have been to assess whether starting a family was non-negotiable and, if so, gracefully exit the marriage in the hope of finding someone of like mind. That she went for the nuclear option of serial adultery suggests that she was motivated by a desire to hurt and humiliate him, rather than by “finding herself.” Her response to his severing his own virility was, in effect “You want castration? I’LL SHOW YOU CASTRATION!!” Her reference to the arrangement throughout the book as their “project” demonstrates an unwillingness to deal with the mundane and tawdry reality of their mutual infidelity, and to place it in a more enlightened or sophisticated light. It’s really just a garden-variety trial separation, not an “open marriage,” in that they are not living together as man and wife, and it was imposed by one party upon the other, who grudgingly accepts it, as his only other option would be to tell her that if she leaves, she should not come back. Likewise, there is nothing brave or transgressive about her actions. Women who declare themselves willing and available, unlike men, generally have little trouble attracting attention. A woman who goes up to ten men at random and says “Let’s f*ck” likely will get what she wants from seven or eight of them. A man who does the same with ten random women will likely get a split lip, two black eyes, and several hand-shaped welts on his face. Though she imposes three rules on the separation, she breaks two of them before it even gets underway. It’s telling that she only considers herself as “cheating” when she has flings before the onset and after the end of the project. Other rule-breaking is sometimes overt, sometimes implied – for instance, she alludes a couple of times to attending Saturday-through-Sunday workshops at a sex commune with which she has hooked up, with no acknowledgement or explanation as to why she did this on the days they were ostensibly living as a married couple. Their “don’t ask, don’t tell”

policy is an abrogation of the trust that should exist in a healthy marriage – a sin of dishonesty by omission, rather than commission. Five months into it, she is forced to come home when her sublet runs out. She goes out to see a lover during the week, and Scott texts her that he wants a divorce. She briefly glimpses the full implications of her choice and panics. But when he returns and apologizes in the morning, asking her to stay and make the marriage work, she tells him she is not done yet and finds another apartment, this one no bigger than a hotel room. At this point it’s obvious that the marriage is, for all intents and purposes, dead, but they continue to go through the motions (even tacking an extension on to the end of the project). She eventually moves in to the New Age sex commune. A week before the end, she posts a sign, boldly written in magic marker, on the door of her room, essentially saying “open for business – whatever you want.” With that, it’s no longer selfactualization – it’s rutting. She returns home, and the inevitable happens. The relationship has been damaged beyond repair. She goes back to the commune, with Scott’s knowledge, for a quick handjob (excuse me, “orgasmic meditation”), and soon reconnects with “Alden,” a lover from early in the year. Divorce follows. Despite all her self-analysis and soul-searching, she seems oblivious to the fact that she ended up with a man whose sense of commitment and ethics in a relationship allows him to sleep with another man’s wife. Ironically, her husband Scott had done the same thing before they met; he sees her leaving him for Alden as “karma.” The writing is pedestrian, a women’s magazine article interspersed with sex scenes. Rinaldi’s occasional flashes of insight can be funny, as when she describes some of the more cultish and dedicated members of the sex commune. They claim to be seeking enlightenment; she, a selfdescribed bookie’s daughter from Scranton, admits that she’s there mainly to get laid. By the volume's end, I had the sense she was trying mightily to justify blowing up a loving, if somewhat stale relationship that she had nurtured for eighteen years. She hints at an awareness of the consequences when she writes that her actions cost her not only her marriage, but all the memories, people, places, experiences, and music they had accumulated as a couple over two decades. She still had them, but they had been forever altered and clouded by what she had done. Perhaps the most pathetic moment (in both senses of the word, “full of pathos” and “small, sad, and petty”) comes as she looks out over the city’s skyline to the neighborhood where she and Scott had bought their first home together not long before. She realizes that she had sought her whole life, from her difficult childhood in an alcoholic family through her time with Scott, to find a home of her own, only to deliberately and utterly destroy it in two years when she finally achieved it. 18 of 20 people found the following review helpful. Two Hours You'll Never Get Back By speedy nipper So you thought Elizabeth Gilbert was the most self absorbed annoying wife ever to write a memoir? Or Cheryl Strayed whined the most in print blaming her upbringing on her dysfunctional life? Well step back! This one tops them both. Manages to combine an annoying narrative with pages of poorly written soft core porn. Take my advice: avoid this book - and consider de-friending anyone you know who claims to have liked it/been inspired by it etc.

I hated hated hated this book. But I had to finish it just to confirm my hope - spoiler alert - that her husband managed to escape the personal hell. He did. One star for the happy ending. 48 of 59 people found the following review helpful. Your ability to commit to loving your spouse after new love's passion fades is a demonstration of your character. By Jelly Bean Rinaldi's story, while an interesting read I finished in a couple hours, has been experienced by countless middle-aged men and women. Her feelings and experiences aren't as special as she imagines them. While most men and women will not launch into a sexual all-you-can-eat in the way in which she did, it's entirely commonplace to feel unhappy in marriage, to feel unfulfilled in life, to feel sexually frustrated by our mates at different stages of life. Nothing in life is perfect, and this includes our mates and our marriages. I'm a 40 year-old woman whose own 21-year marriage has taught me things about myself, life and marriage in general. The central thing I've learned is that none of us are perfect. And none of us can meet every single need our spouses have, without fail. For me there is grace in allowing my husband to be human - to fail. I don't require that he be all things and do all things perfectly. He cannot fill all voids. His failures don't give me license to cheat, to allow myself to become embittered or poisoned with self pity. Was Scott selfish? Yes. But predictably, as water seeks its own level, so, too, is Robin. I don't dislike Robin. She's simply immature and self-involved to a degree I hope to never be. I wonder how much time Robin spent pondering whether she was meeting every single need and desire her husband had? Was she the perfect wife? Was she physically resplendent? Did her body defy aging such that she remained the perfect object of desire for her husband? Was she blessed with a system of ethics, morality, principles and integrity that make men proud? Was she intellectually challenging? Did she engage her husband in heated debate or long discussion(s) about an array of thought-provoking subjects? Was she the perfect cook? Keep her home beautifully clean and organized? Did she nurture her husband unfailingly? Was she sexually adventuresome and ravenous? Was she filthy in the way most men [secretly] long their wives to be? Did she initiate sex spontaneously in various locations? Did she change positions? Enjoy quickies? Initiate nights of prolonged lovemaking? Did she keep herself perfectly groomed and come to bed boldly naked or beautifully adorned? Was she tireless? Emotionally rock solid? A good human being not prone to resentments and poisonous acts of revenge? No. Robin failed in every one of these areas, like most of us do. I cringed as I finished Rinadli's book, much the way I cringe any time I see someone I love making a mistake. Isn't it tragic how easily we can see the mistakes others are making, but we're so blind to our own (chuckles)? Rinaldi made a mistake. To trade in a loving, loyal, cerebral, hard-working, adventuresome, giving man - one without substance abuse problems, children with other women, one who isn't a financial train wreck, has a solid work ethic, isn't emotionally or physically abusive, one who respects their relationship enough to remain faithful, a man with whom you've shared many long years of your life's journey because he could not give you one thing you felt entitled to is pitiable. Her new mate will fail her as well, and likely in more egregious ways. And if she feels compelled to trade in men when they fail her in very real, substantial ways, she'll be trading in her mates for what remains of her life. And she'd better hope the men in her life don't hold her to such standards, else she find herself traded in as well.

There is wisdom in understanding life's tradeoffs. Everything in life requires compromise: getting your degree, buying your dream home, becoming parents, and yes…marriage. There is grace in knowing what things we MUST have in order to live, and in being flexible with our lives and our loves when our lives and our spouses seem to fail us at different times and to differing degrees. Haven't most of us over age 30 seen 40-something "sexually unfulfilled" men leave their wives for a woman with whom they find hotter sex? We all know the folly in this, as it is inevitable that sex with the mistress WILL lose its spark, too, if given enough time. If Robin Rinaldi were 45 year-old Robert Rinaldi, complaining about sex with his wife, and feeling entitled to sleep around because of his wife's character or bedroom failures - would his story be well-received? Robin is laboring under the delusion that to indulge your impulses or to prioritize the pursuit of sexual thrill above all else makes her a daring woman. She's wrong. As any who have chosen to love one person for decades of their lives will no doubt attest: it requires true daring in the bold, fearless and undaunted definition of the word to remain steadfast at your partner's side, unmoved. I'm reminded of Shakespeare's Sonnet 116: Love is not love Which alters when it alteration finds, Or bends with the remover to remove. O no! it is an ever-fixed mark That looks on tempests and is never shaken; It is the star to every wand'ring bark, Whose worth's unknown, although his height be taken. Love's not Time's fool, though rosy lips and cheeks Within his bending sickle's compass come; Love alters not with his brief hours and weeks, But bears it out even to the edge of doom. If this be error and upon me prov'd, I never writ, nor no man ever lov'd. At some point in the future I imagine Robin will have regrets. She could be any one of us. Let's try to learn from watching her live these [tragic] mistakes on paper so that we can save ourselves a similar pitiable mistake. In twenty-one years, I've felt disappointed by my husband in several different areas of our marriage. Strangely, when I forgive or think on my own character flaws and failings in my marriage instead of dwelling on his, I soon discover something absolutely wonderful he is or has done for me in short order. My husband will never be perfect. And that's OK, because I won't, either. Life isn't some erotic, romantic cinematic experience, with accompanying moving soundtrack. Mine is more a comedy. Beside me is a man who has witnessed me grow from a teen into a middle-aged woman. He's witnessed my successes and crushing failures. He's handled the ways in which I've changed physically and emotionally over two decades. He's taken care of me when I was sick. Provided when I couldn't contribute. We've a shared history - his story and mine intertwined completely. There is something profound in a man looking at you and saying: "I love you so deeply that no character flaw, mistake or failing you may have or do will cause me to judge you, stop loving you or walk out on you. I'm here to love you for the rest of my days". You'll find your own strength of character when you find yourself able to say those same words to another person - and mean them. See all 157 customer reviews...

THE WILD OATS PROJECT: ONE WOMAN'S MIDLIFE QUEST FOR PASSION AT ANY COST BY ROBIN RINALDI PDF

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“The Wild Oats Project uniquely chronicles an intelligent woman's exhilarating pilgrimage into the rest of her life, living as she damn well pleases. And why not? Men have been doing so since the beginning of time. Rinaldi's memoir is groundbreaking, sexy, and a joy to read.” ?Suzanne Finnamore, author of Split: A Memoir of Divorce “Robin Rinaldi's The Wild Oats Project is a daring and enlightening exploration of sexual identity, marriage, and the search for an authentic self. Rinaldi takes the reader on an enthralling journey, one that will not soon be forgotten. The Wild Oats Project is a rich and essential read.” ?Laura van den Berg, author of The Isle of Youth “I loved this brave and inspiring book. Rinaldi rejects middle-aged quiescence in favor of living boldly, sensually, and to the hilt. Would that we all were so brave.” ?Julia Scheeres, New York Times bestselling author of Jesus Land “Extraordinarily frank . . . Her book is important because of the way it unashamedly puts the quest for female sexual fulfillment centre stage . . . It is a testament to how far feminism has taken us all that a woman can not only undertake such an adventure but write about it so brazenly. And in a porn-saturated world where, too often, the lens through which we see sex is masculine, her unapologetic account of her search for sexual nirvana is hugely refreshing.” ?Sunday Times “[Rinaldi] seduces us with her candor and vulnerability” ?Chicago Tribune

About the Author Robin Rinaldi is a journalist and the author of The Wild Oats Project: One Woman's Midlife Quest for Passion at Any Cost. Her bylines appear in The New York Times, Oprah Magazine, Yoga Journal, and elsewhere, and she has been featured on Dr. Oz, The Meredith Vieira Show, Dr. Drew, and BBC Radio.

The Wild Oats Project: One Woman's Midlife Quest For Passion At Any Cost By Robin Rinaldi. Modification your habit to put up or squander the time to just talk with your friends. It is done by your everyday, don't you really feel burnt out? Now, we will reveal you the new behavior that, in fact it's an older habit to do that could make your life a lot more certified. When really feeling burnt out of consistently chatting with your pals all downtime, you can discover guide qualify The Wild Oats Project: One Woman's Midlife Quest For Passion At Any Cost By Robin Rinaldi then read it.