Traditional Family Parenting

 

       

Mahkesis Consulting - Janet Fox 1-780-870-6599 [email protected]

INTRODUCTION TRADITIONAL FAMILY PARENTING

For many years the First Nations people of Canada have been the subject of the many studies in the areas of justice, healing, education and health on what will help our people to have better lives. Despite the efforts that have been made; the lives of our people have not changed very much. We are only about 6 - 8 % of each provincial population and we still are over represented in the areas of Child Welfare and the Justice system. There are currently over 27,500 children in foster homes in Canada. Even at the peak of the residential school era these numbers are higher. So, again all these children coming back to our communities are displaced and most importantly lose their identity, parenting skills, language and traditions. The same effects that destroyed our traditional family systems from colonization and residential school are still here. The western world has devalued our language, customs and traditions. We are using knowledge systems that have never worked for us. It is now time to Reclaim our knowledge and provide and implement programs by our own people using the Indigenous philosophies. Decolonization is the process of Reclaiming of who we are as Indigenous people; by reaching into our past and connecting with our Ancestral identity in or order to heal our people. The teachings need to be here for the next generation and the future generations. As parents and grandparents we each have a responsibility to ensure that this can happen and that is by promoting the parenting practices of our ancestors. The teachings are still in our communities and they have been here all along. We must have a beginning so that the generational cycles do not continue. Everyone needs to be in the learning process to make positive changes. So, by promoting the pride and traditional teachings with our people this will make a better future for the next generation.

Janet Fox

What is Parenting?

Parenting involves the protection and the nurturing of our children and grandchildren. We also need to provide the basic necessities for our children, medical care and their safety. By providing the constant care, the parent prepares or guides the child for life. We lead them on their path of purpose from birth. By teaching and role modeling we are preparing them for who they will be when they are old enough to live on their own. We pass on our values, culture and traditions. Indigenous parenting is ensuring that our language and culture survive for future generations. In the fast changing world our culture has survived; we just need to work together so that we have cultural continuity. It is a matter of how we fit in our teachings and to live in two worlds. We can combine our traditional parenting skills with positive contemporary parenting skills. It also is very difficult today to follow the traditional parenting as mothers have careers. We have many children with FAS/FAE, divorce, foster children, family violence and blended families and must find best practices in dealing with these new aspects. Prevention is the key in dealing with what we face today in our communities and more important by approaching parenting in a holistic manner. Our parenting styles are a result of how we were raised; the beliefs that we hold and the experiences we had. It does not matter on how we were raised; we can learn new skills at any age. There was an era that many social problems stem from and that is during the residential school era. We must understand the effects that his has had on our parenting skills. By beginning a healing journey in understanding and forgiving it becomes much easier to move to balance with spirit, emotional, mental and physical. This is the path to personal growth as we learn new skills and understanding. Parents are the main source of change and healing in the family.

Indigenous Worldview The history that was taught in school is not our history. When Columbus landed on Turtle Island, he was lost and thought that he was in the West Indies thus the term 'Indian' was given to our people. We were the First People on this continent which is now North America. First Nations people had inhabited this land for many centuries. Our Creation stories, customs and languages differ but share a common belief that the Mother Earth was to be honored and revered. Our gift from the Creator was Turtle Island and in turn we were to look after it. We are to care for the land and its resources. Our Ancestors were the original environmentalists. There are rules of conduct to follow which is to have respect for all living things. What we take from the land we must give back to Mother Earth with offerings. The traditional teachings are a source of strength, identity and survival. These teachings helped us to understand who we are and how to relate to the natural world. Teachings came in many forms. Some are from an ancient time when the world was a very different place, before it changed to the world we see today. Some are teachings of the natural world which were lessons from the animals, birds, fish, plants and trees. Nature was the original teacher. The Creator made plants and animals first. We learned about relationships and parenting skills from the animals. How nature parents is how we parent. Grandparents were the teachers, sharing the wisdom gained through years of life experience. This passing of wisdom is an elemental part of becoming an Elder. An Elder taught and role modeled the importance of choosing words carefully as to not bring harm to another and to be careful in how you walk so the generations to come will know how to walk in a good way. Kindness and wisdom are the main virtues that an Elder displayed at all times. Today, we still have Elders in our communities that have such wisdom and we must reach out to them. It is said that when an Elder passes on that it is like a 'whole library' has disappeared.

"Tell me and I'll forget, show me and I may not remember. Involve me and I'll understand".

Facilitation -Touching the Heart

To facilitate means 'to assist, to help move along' to end with a positive result. As facilitators we are creating awareness for behavior change and also to increase the participant’s knowledge. It is also moving people to a common understanding of their objectives to make change within their communities and organizations. Telling your personal story is so very powerful and many people will be able to relate to your story. Healing and parenting are the objectives in this training with the emphasis on the early years when bonding is so important. We teach best what we most need to learn. In my family system there are three generations of residential school. The generations before me were raised in residential school and no one showed them parenting skills. My Ancestors were never hugged, kissed or told that they were loved. The bonding and attachment was severed and that is the main focus in 'Traditional Parenting'. Behavior change will happen when you touch the participant’s spirit or touch their hearts. Always be aware of your participants body language as people begin to understand what happened to our people; this will trigger feelings for many. If you are getting triggers from your clients - are you emotionally ready to facilitate groups? This is why I have added the 'Healing the Caregiver' presentation to this training. I use energizers to bring a comfort level to the group. The trust process can be established by getting to know each other first. Encourage participation and use words of encouragement. After the workshop is complete, it is important to debrief. Bringing closure to a group is very important. As our people have always used a 'talking circle' this gives closure to the process. I will use the talking circle format many times throughout the training and at times it is optional is they wish to speak. This is an invaluable part of the process that will not only strengthen people, communities and organizations.

"We can learn each day but we won't remember if it doesn't touch our heart"

Attachment Issues When the first set of children were taken away to residential school in the 1870’s that is when we started to lose our parenting skills. The children were taken from their mothers and were raised without any attachment to parents or caregivers. This cycle has continued to present day. The emotional wounding that happened has been passed from generation to generation. In the western world this is described as 'reactive attachment disorder'. When the bonding has been severed from mother and child. This wounding can extend into the youth stage and into adulthood and can almost determine a person's future if the hurt hasn't ever been dealt with. The past shapes us all in how we communicate and how we handle life's challenges. The bonding that I didn't have shaped my behavior and relationships. A baby relies solely on the mother and I didn't receive this as a child. The trust was broken and so throughout my whole life I could not trust people and form healthy relationships. I stopped growing spiritually, emotionally and mentally in the child stage. There are three generations of residential school in my family. Each generation grew up without parents and there were no parenting skills that were passed to the next generation. At the age of 6 to 9 years old I went to residential school. Throughout my life there was so much shame attached to these years. So, throughout my child, youth and adult years I had low self esteem. Also, I carried so much anger as a result of my experiences in residential school. This is why I put an emphasis on the early years and how this impacted my life. How will the cycles end if we do not have a beginning and start changing the parenting? We are preparing the next generation so they will have a brighter future. I had my first child at 23 years of age and I had the behaviors of a young child. I didn't know how to express myself and reacted in anger many times. I became a 'recovered' parent in my 40's when I eventually had a wakeup call. I needed to heal my past hurts and to become a better parent. I finally started to understand the 'effects' of residential school and eventually worked through this part in my life by finding out who I was and to become a better person. This quest for identity will continue throughout my lifetime. The generational effects would have carried on in my family system if I had not made the changes. Today, my children are better parents than I was when I was their age. The one at the top of the family system has so much power in making change.

"Whatever happened to us in the early years can almost determine how we become if we never deal with our past."

Children in Foster Care There are over 27,000 First Nations children in Foster Care in Canada. Even at the peak of the residential school era, the number of children today in the foster care system are higher. The high number of children in care is due to the generational effects of colonization, residential school and the Scoop. In 1960 - 1980 children were literally scooped from communities and placed in foster homes. There were approximately 11,000 children that were taken and 70% were adopted in non aboriginal homes. This also caused culture and identity confusion. There are not enough First Nation families to accommodate this high number. So many children are placed in non Aboriginal homes and some are being raised not learning their identity. These children have been separated from their mothers and will have the attachment issues. The bond that should have been there has now been severed. Foster parents need to have training in dealing with this. There are also high numbers of children now with FAS/FAE. Children that are raised in foster care should be encouraged to learn about their heritage to be very proud of they are. They must grow up in loving and nurturing homes that value the traditional teachings. For healthy child development they need to have a sense of belonging as this prepares them in the future for adversity. The early years are so important because it prepares them in all areas; relationships, education, family and responsibility. Non aboriginal foster parents can do many activities with children that are in their care. Cross cultural education is needed or Traditional Parenting classes for parents and prospective foster parents so they understand what has happened to First Nations people. Cross cultural education is not about whose culture is better than another but rather to appreciate other cultures. Non Aboriginal Child and Family Services and Foster Parent Associations can have sessions on a regular basis for this type of education. There are many Adoption Centers and Child Family Services centers that understand the need for this information and provide excellent programs for parents. I use this same manual and power point for Cross Cultural Awareness.

"Each child is a gift from the Creator and is loaned to us"

Traditional Family Parenting A child is gift from the Creator and we are to take care of this gift. Elders say that children are not ours but only loaned to us to do Creator's work. From the moment of conception the teachings and education began in our mother's womb. The bonding began in the womb with careful instruction of the mother’s thoughts and to keep our spirit still. In all our traditional systems the child is the centre of attention and the raising of children was by using virtues. The most important was the love for the children. In the first 2 years, it was only mother and child. The first 3 teachings are obedience, respect and humility. These teachings are role modeled by the parents, grandparents and community. This was how the child would develop their personality and behavior. The traditional teachings of parenting have been passed from generation to generation. Our people always have had the knowledge on the importance of bonding and that was why these tools were used. Our children were raised in the natural way and taught mostly by example. Mothers and fathers knew to have balance so as not to ever wound the child's spirit. Our people have always understood the unseen world and it is embedded in all of the teachings. When a mother knew that she was carrying another spirit, she was told to be careful of her thoughts. To be careful of where she went and who she came into contact with. We are now connected to the child through the umbilical cord. We laid in water for 9 months in our mother's womb. This is the natural movement of water and that women are the keepers of the water. The tools that were given to our people for bonding are: the moss bag, cradleboard, traditional swing and amautik.

"Motherhood is sacred and Fatherhood is sacred, it is the most important job that we will ever have". ~Albert Pooley

The Teepee (Mikwhap) - First Classroom When I began my search for parenting skills I visited some Elders about the Teepee Teachings. There are 15 poles to a teepee and they are set in order of age development. The teepee was the first classroom which is the same as our homes today. The virtues are teachings that have been passed down from generation to generation. A child is raised the same way all over the world. The first 6 - 7 years of a child's life is the most crucial time for the teachings to be taught. The first 3 teachings are obedience, respect and humility. Obedience (translation - good listening skills) is the first pole and it has to be taught first and then all the other teachings fall into place. If a child is not taught obedience in the early years then it becomes difficult to teach when they are in the youth stage. The moss bag, cradle board and swaddling is like being in a classroom. When they are wrapped, there isn't much that a child can do so this is when they start to use their sense of hearing, sight, smell and logical thought. The child is watching the parents in the daily roles. Role modeling is so important when children are growing up. They will follow in whatever it is we do whether it is negative or positive. Our goal as parents is to nurture so children will grow up with a sense of being loved and being a part of a family or community. We can do this by always be present in their emotional and spiritual needs. Giving each child individual attention and taking the time to listen on a daily basis. Change your language to using more virtue words. When you acknowledge and touch their hearts they will always remember how that felt. A teachable moment is when a child has displayed kindness, being helpful or being in a cheerful mood. It is important to tell the child that you have seen what they did; example - ‘that is so great that you shared with your friend'. • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Thank you A smile You did a great job Way to go Awesome I love you You are so beautiful/handsome I am so proud of you ___________________________ ___________________________ ___________________________ ___________________________ ___________________________ ___________________________

Oral Teachings from Elders

Placenta ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ Umbilical Cord ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

Soft Spot ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

Moss Bag ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ Cradleboard ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ Traditional Swing - Wiwipison ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

First Moccasins ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ Breast Feeding ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

Stages of the Child - The First 7 Years The teachings begin in our mother's womb as we are now connected to another Spirit. The mother has to be in balance and the be always calm. Her behavior and her moods affected the unborn child. To always be careful of her thoughts and who she came into contact with. Today, many grandmothers will tell the young pregnant women to be careful of thoughts and how she conducted herself. Studies prove today that children that are in a unhealthy environment while the mother is pregant will be affected emotionally in later life. All of these teachings are in the Creation story and we have a responsibility to learn these stories. There are still some Elders that have this knowledge.

Infant - The first 7 years of a child's life are the most important. A strong emotional connection with caregivers prepares this child as they grow older. The moss bag and cradleboard helped with the bonding and also the start of the child's education. The baby is totally dependent on their caregivers and all of the community was responsible for the well being and also for any discipline that was needed. Anyone in a community could discipline a child. Not in the term that they were physically punished but through talking and explaining what this child has done. Children were not punished harshly because of the teaching of the soft spot. A child was never taken out (time out) of the circle/community when they needed correction . This will do more damage to the child as we are never to wound a child's spirit. The wounding and the shaming will do more damage. Children can be shaped and molded in the early years. This is when the caregivers/community need to be careful of how they conduct themselves. Grandparents helped raise the children in the early years because there are some teachings that can only be role modeled such as respect and humility. Today, it is still common that grandparents are raising grandchildren. In the traditional family systems the oldest grandchild was raised by grandparents because this was to ensure that the teachings would carry on for the next generation. To make parenting easier in this stage is understanding the needs and developmental stages in children. Building the trust that the caregiver will always be present helps them thrive.

Youth Stage - 8 to 17 years of age - Girls This is when the teachings began for the youth - the develomental learning began between 8 - 17 years of age. Girls mature faster than boys because a woman needed to be emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically ready to have a child. In this stage they were taught tasks and responsibility from the female relatives. This was the training ground for young girls to prepare for when they would have their own families. The transition from child to womanhood was a 4 day celebration and a ceremony. The young people were honored and recognized when they made this transition. This created healthy self esteem and and a sense of belonging. Rites of Passage - Moon Time (what were they taught in the 4 days)

__________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ What are the teachings to follow when a girl is going through her moon time?

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Youth Stage - 8 to 17 years of age - Boys The transition from a child to a young man was also a celebration and a ceremony. The developmental learning began when their voices started to change. The female relatives were responsible for the emotional learning until this transition took place. As soon as their voices started to change, it was then the male relatives would take over in the teaching of the young men. The 4 day was the training ground for they would be the providers and the protectors. This was called 'Courage of Heart' - connecting the mind with the heart. Rites of Passage

__________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ __________________________________________________________________ Fire Teaching

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How Do We Bring Back These Teachings? • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • • •

Role Modeling - many children came from homes with no role models Love - 20 to 40 positive strokes per day, hugs, kisses, words of encouragement, smiles, being present, listening Create a holistic chart of activities - Spirit, Emotional, Mental, Physical Holistic - Development of the whole child Patience - each child is unique Learn as much as you can about the children in your care. There are over 50 languages across Canada. Find out the customs, practices and language. Make your own power point - children/people are visual learners Find ways to integrate the culture to the children - in cooking, dancing, Take part in traditional activities and crafts. Powwows, round dances, crafts, cultural camps, storytelling and community events Attend ceremonial events and find out about naming ceremonies. Speak to them about diversity. Attend Multi Cultural Events. Educational tools; with the new technology there are now language programs that you can order, download language dictionaries, books that are in the respective languages. Dance videos can now be ordered online - Fancy Dance, Chicken Dance, Traditional, Grass The history taught in the schools has not done justice to First Nations people. Research from both perspectives - western world and First Nations Have a weekly session on the virtues and what it means to each member of the family A child is not born to be racist - it starts from the home. Be careful of your views and words. You can use the 4 seasons for family activities - Example: Spring - it's a time for new beginnings - plant gardens, flowers, preparation for Powwow regalia, beading, sewing Summer - a time for fun - berry picking, attending ceremonies, powwows, naming ceremonies, cultural camps, Fall - preparing for harvest, collecting from nature the crafts that you will make for the winter Winter - activities such as beading, outdoors - snowshoeing, nature walks, reading stories about First Nations people/history, family trees, volunteering

What is Lateral Violence?

Lateral Violence - occurs when a marginalized group has been through colonization. Over time the members start to strike out each other. It becomes internalized anger and people walk around anger and frustration. The oppressed now become the oppressors. This has been a destructive way of life for generations. This is the main cause of why healing has taken a long time in our communities. Many of our people are walking around with memories that they experienced growing up. Some of the symptoms are; gossip, jealousy, backstabbing, family feuds, shunning, nepotism, power and control and religious wars. Healing is still needed within our people. Change will not occur until people recognize their behaviors and where they are stemming from. Education and healing is the key in stopping this. We need to go back to community based thinking. It is quite common to experience lateral violence in the workplace. If we are working in high stress environments and in order for us to survive, our workplace has to be our second home. We need that safe haven and support system with our team members.

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Do not participate in gossip

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Educate people about lateral violence

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Put up Virtue posters in the workplace about Lateral Violence

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Promote healing in your community and the workplace

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Be kind and respectful

"Conflict cannot survive without your participation." Wayne Dyer

Taking Care of Our Spirit Before we can begin to make positive changes in other people's lives, we must first take care of ourselves. How can we take care of others when we are not in balance? Carrying our own personal trauma not only affects us but also our families, co workers and participants. Is there still historical trauma in your life? Your story can determine your future if you live in the past. Whatever we may have experienced in the first 7 years of our lives can affect us our whole lives if we never move beyond those negative experiences. Our behavior is shaped by what happened in the early years. Forgiveness is the key to moving forward. Many of us were not taught how to grieve and addressing these issues will only make our lives to be more peaceful and balanced. It is important to understand what 'Vicarious Trauma' means. It is a process of change when we care for other people and the effects by seeing their trauma on a daily basis. This is one the reasons why people will experience 'burn out'. When we witness trauma on a daily basis; this will start to affect us. This is because of not addressing our own issues. There is a high staff turnover in areas of social workers, teachers and front line staff. Some people will think that by quitting their jobs is the answer however wherever a person goes; your own trauma will follow. Our own well being is affected of the 4 aspects of spirit, mental, physical and emotional. A person cannot be stuck in one area but to have balance with all of the aspects. By being aware of how we are feeling is the key to maintaining balance. Making a connection to present and past events is a part of being aware or having insights. There is nothing wrong when you are a deeply caring person, however how can we be resilient when we do not care for ourselves first.

'Humankind has not woven the web of life, we are but one thread in it. Whatever we do to the web; we do to ourselves. All things are bound together. All things connect.' Chief Seattle 1854

Balance - Spirit, Mental, Emotional, Physical

Balance is using our mind, body, spirit and emotion. It is about being grounded and to be aware at all times. East - new beginnings, time of change South - the summer of your life, ideas come to full blossom, bring life back to order West - time of harvest, rest, time of change for our bodies and Mother Earth North - Winter of your life, white hair of Elders, reflection, renewal, let go of old habits

3 Life Questions

Who Am I? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

What is My Purpose? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ __________________t___________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

What do I want to leave for my children and grandchildren? ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

'D on't be afraid to cry. It will free your m ind from sorrowful thoughts'. U nknow n

Self Care Strategies

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Be kind to yourself An adult needs 20 positive strokes per day (hugs, kiss, encouragement, support) Build a support base Your work place has to be your second home Balance - where are you on the wheel Rest and eat healthy Take a break Breathing exercises Pray and meditate Laughter Affirmations Build a library of self help tools - books, DVD's, music Attend a ceremony Educate the mind Have boundaries - so 'no' Leave work at workplace - have a marker to remind you Spiritual Companioning - go visiting Stay of social media Family nights Volunteer if it feels good Nature hike Learn a new skill or interest

“In dealing w ith those w ho are undergoing great suffering, if you feel “burnout” setting in, if you feel dem oralized and exhausted, it is best, for the sake of everyone, to w ithdraw and restore yourself. The point is to have a long-term perspective.” ~ D alai Lam a

Handouts

1. 4 Life Cycle

2. The Teepee

3. Affirmations

4. Evaluation Form

Mikiwahp  –  The  Teepee  

    1. Obedience    

 

 

 

2. Respect  

 

 

 

               10.    Share  

3. Humility    

 

 

               11.    Strength  

4. Happiness    

 

 

               12.    Good  Child  Rearing  

5. Love    

 

 

 

               13.    Hope  

6. Faith    

 

 

 

               14.    Ultimate  Protection  

7. Kinship  

 

 

 

           15.    Control  Flaps  from  the  Wind  

8. Cleanliness    

9.    Thankfulness  

Affirmations

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I am willing to release my fears. I live and move in a safe and secure world. I free myself from all destructive fears and doubts. I accept myself and create peace in my mind and heart. I rise above thoughts that attempt to make me angry or afraid. I release the past with ease and trust the process of life. I am willing to release the need for this protection. I am now willing to see only my magnificence. I have the power to make changes. I am always divinely protected.

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I am healthy and the gift of life is keeping me alive

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Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you

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I now move into a new era of prosperity and abundance

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Something wonderful will happen to me today

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honoring each other with respect creates balance and love

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God is good to me

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Every thought I think is creating my future

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I am now in the process of attracting all that I need to do, know, or have

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All is well in my world

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I am free of the past and I now live my life in balance

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I write my own story

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I walk in balance each day

Traditional Family Parenting Evaluation Form

Your Name _______________________Date___________________________________ 5 = excellent

4 = very good

3 = good

2 = needs improvement

1. Overall rating of the workshop

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2. Overall rating of the presenter (s)

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3. Contributed valuable knowledge to me

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1 = poor

4. The most important thing I learned in the training was: ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ 5. What I appreciated the most in the this workshop was ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ 6. One skill I will put into action immediately is: ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ 7. Other comments ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________ ______________________________________________________________________________

Energizers Getting to know each other 10 - 15 minutes Pair off - start a dialogue with the person 'If you only knew me". Switch to another person Humor Activity - Contagious Laugh 5 - 10 minutes - try different variations - how women laugh, men, grandmothers, etc One person starts off by giving a 'hearty laugh', turn to the next person and it continues around the circle Ending the Day Activity - Circle Say a virtue word, or hug, handshake to all the participants. Example - thank you for being here, you are such an awesome person, thank you for being my friend, etc. Variation - each person to tape a sheet of paper on their back. Everyone will write a virtue word on each person's sheet of paper. Each person will read to the group what was written. Ask how that makes them feel. Standing Ovation When we speak we use our hands - 2 to 4 volunteers. As they speak on a humorous topic; if they lift their right hand the participant’s clap, left hand - cheer, when they lift both hands standing ovation, clap and cheer. Give the volunteers 2 minutes to make a speech on their choice or you can give ideas. Example - what will you when you become a millionaire, what was it like when you were on the Oprah show, etc. Write your name Pretend that you have a pencil in the front of your stomach. Write your name first and then print. Encourage to dot the 'I's and cross the 'T's'. Using music is fun for this activity. Have you seen Mrs. Mumblebee? Ask the person next to you ‘have you seen Mrs. Mumblebee’, they will answer back ‘no, I haven’t’. Each person speaks as if they have no teeth. Speaking in your own language is a great way of doing this.